Love is a choice, not a feeling

  1. Love is a choice
    Love isn’t a feeling but a conscious choice, a deliberate act of will. We don’t love someone by simply having or developing a warm, mushy sentimental feeling for him; we are to love the person by making a decision to care for him and to look out for his best interest. We choose to love—it’s a deliberate commitment and resolve that involves action, effort and sometimes, sacrifice.
  2. Love is action
    We’ve all heard dozens of sermons on the famous passage on love in 1 Corinthians 13. It’s often preached at weddings, which ironically, tend to focus on the sentimental, lovey-dovey aspect of the union. Ever notice that the description of love is all about what it is and what it does? (Quick recap: Love is patient/kind, and is not proud/self-seeking/easily angered. It rejoices with truth/protects/trusts/hopes/perseveres, and does not envy/boast/dishonor/keep record of wrongs/delight in evil.) Not a single word about what love feels.
  3. Love keeps a relationship going no matter what
    When we make a deliberate decision to love, our relationships will take on a new meaning and strength. Why? Because these relationships will no longer depend on how we feel about the other person, or what the other person says or does. They will not be destroyed by anger, resentment, or wrongdoing. They will not be conditional.The most powerful relationships are driven by love coming from a conscious, deliberate choice. Remember the parable of the father whose scoundrel son squandered his share of the inheritance? When the prodigal son returned, the loving father was all ready to receive him, because his lasting love saw past his son’s mistakes (Luke 15:11-32). It didn’t depend on what the son had said or done. Will our romantic relationships be powered by the same love? Of course, we usually start off with the warm, fuzzy feelings of romance which lead to marriage. Will these emotions be eventually based on a stronger commitment to keep on loving even when cracks and character flaws start to appear? Will this conscious decision to love be able to take a marriage through the worst crises?
  4. Love will eventually feel
    We are not expected to love with our own strength—in fact, the love described in 1 Corinthians 13 is impossible to achieve without a new heart that only God can give.

    (Source: Why love isn’t a feeling )

Love is a choice, not a feeling

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